When you have children, and then grandchildren, your life totally changes. It is never your own life again. Once you become a parent, your life is no longer about the things that YOU want, it becomes about what is best for your child.
We should always be living our lives for what GOD wants for us, but most of us get involved in making the almighty buck, getting the next, newest toy, keeping up with what everyone else is doing! "Well they have a new jet ski/four wheeler/house/car, so I need to get one too!" Is that how God wants us to behave?
Not very long ago, my pastor, Jared Hollier, gave a sermon about coveting. He was doing a series on the ten commandments and, of course, THOU SHALL NOT COVET, was one of his sermons, and a very good one I might add.
But we all, no matter how hard we try not to, we still covet. We want the newer, bigger, better version of whatever we already have. WHY??
Honestly, what is so great about having a 70 inch television on an 96 inch wall? Especially if your room, living room/den, is only a 12x12 room. Even an 16x16 room is too small for a television the size of a movie theater screen!!! WHY do you need one that large?
Usually it's because someone you know has gotten one that maybe is that size or a little smaller, so you want to be as good or better then them and have the same or a larger television.
Did you know that God doesn't care how big you television is? In fact, He would probably prefer you didn't even have one. Spend the time you would be watching TV reading His word and learning about Him, or praying, or serving Him.
Do you know that God doesn't care what kind of car you drive, or house you live in, or toys you have? In fact, He would probably prefer that you concern yourself more with serving Him, even if it means selling some of those 'toys'.
Somewhere in this world there are people who don't know where their next meal is coming from, they don't know if they are going to have a place to safely lay their head tonight to sleep. Somewhere there is a family living in their car because they can't afford rent. Somewhere there are children, and adults, wondering if the water they are drinking is safe.
Does any of that apply to you? I doubt it, but what are you doing to change any of that? Are you actively seeking out someone in need? Keep in mind, someone near you may have a need that is not as drastic as those I mentioned, but they still have a need. Maybe there is a young mother who desperately needs someone to just visit her. Maybe there is an older church member who isn't able to get out much, if at all, who would love nothing more than for you to go over and have a cup of coffee with them!
Perhaps the person in need is right under your nose. The person that looks like they have it all together, may be so torn up inside they don't know how to pray for their problems without appearing selfish, yet they have the kinds of problems that we know God can and will take care of. This person who is right next to you in church may have something going on in their life that they don't want to discuss publicly, but a visit from one of their fellow church members to listen and pray with them would most likely mean the world to them.
We are such a fortunate society if you really think about it. Most of us don't have to wonder about our next meal, or if we are going to have a place to lay our head at night, but we may be wondering how we are going to make it through this storm in our lives.
The storms we suffer through could be a child having difficulties, medical problems, job problems, differences with a neighbor, a grown child in trouble. There are so many things that go on in our every day lives, most of us take for granted that everyone around us has it all together and is probably not in need of prayer or anything else we might have to offer.
Please rethink that. Carefully watch those around you, listen to the conversations around you, notice the people at church. Do they seem genuinely happy, or do they appear to have something on their mind that might be hindering their worship of our Lord God?
If you notice someone who maybe appears to be down, or distracted, talk to them. Let them know that you are available if they ever want to talk, or need anything; and then follow up with them! Give them a day or two and then you call them, or go see them. If the problem has them that distracted and they don't want to speak about it publicly, they are probably too embarrassed to call you to ask for help, so you call them and make the offer.
What can you do to help them? Maybe they just need an ear to listen, a shoulder to cry on, someone to pray with them. Some may actually need other types of assistance. They may need financial to get them through the week, until the next pay day. Maybe they need assistance taking care of something in their home. Find out their need, and then fill that need.
1 John 3:16-20 "This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down His life for us. And we ought to lay down our lives for our brothers. If anyone has material possessions and sees his brother in need but has no pity on him, how can the love of God be in him? Dear children, let us not love with words or tongue but with actions and in truth. This then is how we know that we belong to the truth, and how we set our hearts at rest in His presence whenever our hearts condemn us. For God is greater than our hearts, and He knows everything."
If you truly love God, find someone in need, even if they just need some company for a while, or you may find someone in need of $100 or more to pay a bill. Help them find a way to do it, even if it means giving it to them yourself. Trust me, if you do this, God will bless you!!
I'll end this with my church motto.... DO SOMETHING!!!
When Michael and Liam began meeting for Monday morning breakfast at 6 a.m. more than five months ago, they originally thought it would be a one-time event. They met in a couples' Bible study group in their church. For many reasons, they hit it off and were becoming good friends. The two men enjoyed their time together so much that the one-time event became a weekly event.
Liam didn't take long to get to the point. "Michael," he began, "Lana and I have decided to leave the church." The pause seemed to last minutes. Neither of the men knew who should speak next. Michael took the initiative and spoke softly yet deliberately. "You want to tell me about it?" Michael inquired. He honestly didn't know if Liam wanted to say any more about it. His friend seemed resolute. Nevertheless, Liam began to explain his feelings and decision.
"Lana and I went to the church to learn deep truths about the Bible," Liam offered. "But Pastor Robert is just not feeding us. We're not getting anything out of his messages. Sitting in the service on Sunday morning is a waste of our time."
Michael didn't respond but could tell that Liam had more to say.
"There are several great people in the church," Liam continued. "You and Karen are the best, and there are a few more like you." He paused and his facial expression became even more serious. "But, honestly, Michael, our church is full of hypocrites. Did you hear Jim at the kids' basketball game? He embarrassed me the way he was calling out the refs. What kind of testimony is that for a Christian? And of course, everyone knows about Neal. He was supposedly this pillar of the church, and we found out he's been cheating on his wife for more than a year. What kind of church is this with these kinds of people?"
Liam was angry but controlled as he continued to vent. "Look, Pastor Robert acts like he cares for us, but I'm not sure he does. I told him that Lana's dad was in the hospital for hernia surgery, and he never visited him."
Michael knew that Lana's father was not a church member, and he lived 50 miles away. He also knew that Pastor Robert called him and prayed with him. But he also knew that any rebuttal would not be timely at the moment. Michael held his tongue.
It seemed that Liam's mild rant was winding down. Liam seemed exhausted, ready to bring the conversation to a close. He did, however, offer a few pointed comments and two insightful questions.
"Michael," Liam began softly. "I really like you and Karen and your kids. All of you are a class act." He paused briefly. "But you seem enthused about the church. You keep serving and contributing. Don't get me wrong, but I wonder at times if you are blind to all the problems in the church."
Then Liam offered a closing that spoke more than he realized. "We are two different types of church members," he stated. "Why is that? Why do we have such different perspectives?"
The difference
Nine out of 10 churches in America are declining or growing at a slower pace than that of their communities. Simply stated, churches are losing ground in their own backyards.Another way of looking at it is generationally. About two-thirds of the Builder generation, those born before 1946, are Christians. However, only 15 percent of Millennials, those born between 1980 and 2000, are Christians. Millennials are the largest generation in America's history with almost 80 million members.
And we have all but lost that generation.
We can blame it on the secular culture. And we often do.
We can blame on the godless politics of our nation. We do that as well.
We can even blame it on the churches, the hypocritical members, and the uncaring pastors. Lots of Christians do that.
I'm proposing that we who are church members need to look in the mirror. I'm suggesting that congregations across America are weak because many of us church members have lost the biblical understanding of what it means to be a part of the body of Christ.
We join our churches expecting others to serve us, to feed us, and to care for us.
We don't like the hypocrites in the church, but we fail to see our own hypocrisies.
God didn't give us local churches to become country clubs where membership means we have privileges and perks.
He placed us in churches to serve, to care for others, to pray for leaders, to learn, to teach, to give, and, in some cases, to die for the sake of the gospel.
Many churches are weak because we have members who have turned the meaning of membership upside down. It's time to get it right. It's time to become church members as God intended. It's time to give instead of being entitled.
A new path
Though it's a small step, I'm suggesting that church members consider a new path. There are six steps we should carefully and prayerfully take. Let's consider each of these steps to be the type of church member God called us to be.First, let's note the metaphor of membership.
It's not membership as in a civic organization or a country club. It's the kind of membership given to us in 1 Corinthians 12:27, "Now you are the body of Christ and individual members of it." Because I'm a member of the body of Christ, I must be a functioning member, whether I'm an "eye," an "ear," or a "hand." As a functioning member, I will give. I will serve. I will minister. I will evangelize. I will study. I will seek to be a blessing to others.Second, I will strive to be a source of unity in the church.
I know there are no perfect pastors, staff, or other church members. But I'm not perfect either. I won't be a source of gossip or dissension. One of the greatest contributions I can make is to do all I can in God's power to help keep the church in unity for the sake of the gospel.Third, I will not let my church be about my preferences and desires; that's self-serving.
I'm in this church to serve others and to serve Christ. My Savior went to the cross for me. I can deal with any inconveniences and matters that aren't my preference or style.Fourth, I will pray for my pastor every day. His work is never-ending.
His days are filled with constant demands for his time, with the need to prepare sermons, with those who are rejoicing in births, with those who are traveling through the valley of the shadow of death, with critics, with the hurts and hopes of others, and with the need to be a husband and a father. My pastor cannot serve our church in his own power.Fifth, I will lead my family to be good members of this church as well.
We will pray together for our church. We will worship together in our church. We will serve together in our church. And we will ask Christ to help us fall deeper in love with this church because He gave His life for her.This article is an excerpt adapted from I Am a Church Member by Thom S. Rainer.